


I Haven't Slept A Wink

by VerticalMan



Category: The Beatles (Band)
Genre: M/M, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-21 20:46:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22436599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VerticalMan/pseuds/VerticalMan
Summary: John is having a hard time falling asleep while sharing a room with Ringo.
Relationships: John Lennon/Ringo Starr
Comments: 9
Kudos: 93





	1. Chapter 1

John couldn't sleep. It really wasn't an uncommon occurrence, but it was still bloody irritating. It was dark, he was tired, and Ringo was quiet and still, sharing a bed with him for the night. But still, he couldn't get to sleep. He'd been tossing and turning for what felt like forever, so it was honestly a miracle he hadn't woken Ringo. Just as he thought that though, while turning over once again, Ringo shifted.

John weighed his options if Ringo woke up: pretend to be asleep, tell him to go back to sleep, annoy him further. He was just about bored enough to pick annoy, but it turned out he wouldn't get to, as Ringo was just turning over in his sleep. Turning towards John, with his arm held out, almost like an invitation. An invitation for John to lay against him.

John bit his lip, considering. Somehow, it seemed inviting, even though cuddling with your mates was a queer thing to do. At least when it was on purpose, as all four of them had been pressed together enough that it had happened on accident in the past.

It's just that Ringo looked so steady, and John's thoughts were anything but tonight. Ringo always had kind of a sure, steady feeling about him, and it seemed even more so when he was still. He looked peaceful, though a little sad somehow, and john had to stop himself when he thought  _ handsome _ for a second. Really, it was just easier to ignore his nose.

Drawn in by Ringo's soft, quiet breathing, he slowly scoots himself in closer, praying that this won’t be the thing to finally wake him up. He puts his head on Ringo's chest, and tenses up when Ringo's arm seems to shift to hold on to him, but his breathing stays even. And oh, he can hear his breathing. It's kind of soothing. He's worried still that Ringo will wake up and call him queer, but he doesn't know he did it on purpose. If he's really mad, he can just say it happened while he was asleep. God knows George would grab anyone while he was asleep.

As he lays there, head on Ringo's chest, held in his arms, he feels good. Protected almost. Which is a queer thing to think, but hes just sick enough of his loud swirling thoughts that he lets it slide. Listening to his steady breathing and heartbeat, like a bass drum, he slips into sleep without even realizing.

John wakes up to the feeling of someone petting his hair, and he nuzzles his head further into the person's neck on instinct. It's when he hears a soft deep laugh that he remembers who he's in bed with. Ringo. Ringo, who definitely isn't freaking out and calling him queer.

"Morning John, did you sleep alright?" He has a bit of a joking tone, but he doesn't seem bothered by it. "I must've grabbed you at some point, sorry lad." Thank God.

"Morning Richie." John said, somewhat reluctantly pulling back from his warm body. "I slept great actually." And he did, better than he had in years. What did that say about him? Falling asleep in a man's arms and enjoying it. The self deprecating thought caught in his throat though when Ringo sends him the brightest, most genuine smile.

"Good, you don't sleep enough. I woulda let you sleep more, but I've really gotta piss and you were kinda on top of me." And with that, Ringo starts to get up, and john wants to reach out and hold him there. Instead, he lays in bed, and weighs his the thought of cuddling with a man versus finally getting a good night's sleep. He would do it again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this isn't too disjointed, I wrote parts of this chapter months apart from each other. I was pretty sure it was just going to stay unfinished until I got the sudden inspiration to finish it today. I hope y'all enjoy!

For the past few hotels they’d each been getting their own beds, and John had been sharing a room with Paul in order to write before sleeping. Or before Paul sleeps, anyway. John hadn’t gotten a good night’s sleep since he shared a bed with Ringo. It’d put him in a bit of a pissy mood, honestly.

"SHUT UP!" He yelled at the screaming audience in between songs. It wasn't that uncommon, but apparently he seemed a little angrier than normal, judging by how Paul and George looked over to him. It was only a moment though before Paul got right back into what he was saying with a smile.

John took the opportunity to glance behind him at Ringo. He was already looking at John, and he seemed a little concerned. But then he sent John a reassuring smile, and something inside of him loosened. He sent a smile back to him, and before he knew it, Ringo was drumming and John had to hurry and figure out what song they were on.

The rest of their rather short show went off without a hitch, with John sneaking a grin back to Ringo when he could. It made their shows more fun, watching Ringo having fun, and banging on the drums with so much energy. It wasn't until they had taken their last bow and left the stage that John was reminded of his outburst.

"John, can you please stop yelling at the audience?" Brian sighed in place of a greeting.

"Oh please, it's not like they can hear what I'm yelling anyway." John said, crossing his arms. 

"We do still have an image to keep up, the girls won't love you forever if you keep telling them to shut up." John cringed slightly, and Brian walked off to go talk to someone else, hopefully to tell off the sound guys for their shitty mics.

"Have you been sleeping alright, John?" John turned towards the voice and found Ringo, once again with a concerned look on his face. John remembered the last time he slept well,  _ in Ringo’s arms _ , and tried not to blush.

"Yeah, perfectly fine." He lied, not wanting to give Ringo a chance to figure out why he slept well that night before. He didn't want Ringo thinking he was queer after all. Ringo didn't really seem convinced, so John added "just bloody sick of these girls drowning out all our music." Ringo lightened up at that.

"Yeah, you'd think with all the money they're paying to see us they might actually want to be able to hear the music."

"Ah Richie, you know they're all only here to see your beautiful mug." John batted his eyelashes obnoxiously, leaning into Ringo's space, and Ringo pushed him away, laughing.

“Alright John, I’m totally beat. Lets see if the others are ready to go back to the hotel.”

As it turns out they were ready, and Now the four of them stood in the hallway of the floor they were staying on with Brian, waiting for him to assign rooms for the night.

“Alright boys, we’ve got two rooms, but just one bed in each of them I’m afraid.” John thought of that night before, and how calm it had been once he’d gotten over himself and cuddled up. He thought of how Ringo seemed to have noticed that he wasn’t sleeping well recently.

“I’ll share with Ringo”, he said to the group at large. He waited anxiously for someone to figure him out, call him queer, but no one did. Paul just shrugged.

"S'fine with me, which room are we Brian?" While they went off in the direction of their room, Ringo gave john a brilliant smile.

"Well here's hoping for a good night's sleep without George's starfishing." He said, and unlocked their own room, walking in.

Ringo must not have been joking about being tired. John had gone to the bathroom to shower and change as soon as they'd gotten in the room, and by the time he made it back out, Ringo was already asleep in bed, faced towards the middle and being all tempting.

John still had some reservations about doing this. But, he already was sharing a bed with him, and he really could use a good night's sleep. Who knows, maybe it would only work once, and after tonight he could let it go and stop thinking about cuddling with his mate. When he first got into bed he stayed a respectful distance away, not wanting to wake Ringo if he was still in a light sleep. But before too long he gave in and shifted to lay against him. Just like last time, he put his head on Ringo's chest, and just like last time, Ringo unconsciously held on to him. John sighed. It was ridiculous that this felt nicer than cuddling with any bird had. He once again fell asleep easily.

For a while after that, they seemed to hit a stretch of hotels where they had to share a bed. Where John would previously have complained to Eppy about it endlessly, he found himself enjoying it now that he knew he could get a good night’s sleep. But that left him worried that someone was going to catch on that something was happening. He didn’t used to jump on an opportunity to share a room with Ringo. But even if it seemed like there was something fishy going on, there wasn’t really...

“John love, I’m glad you’ve stopped yelling so much at the audience, but do you think you could look at them?” Brian asked him one day after a show. John froze.

“What do you mean by that?”

“You spent maybe half the show looking back at Ringo. The audience needs to take priority.” Oh. John hadn’t realized he was looking at Ringo that much. He just liked to glance back every once in a while to see him play. There was yet another thing he had to keep under wraps.

“Sorry Eppy, there were just some real uglies out in the crowd tonight.” He responded, trying not to let on that anything might be out of the ordinary. Brian just sighed in response.

“Don’t do it again John.” and with that he walked away. John snorted. At least when he got chewed out by Brian it was always fast.

That night though, as he got ready for bed after the boys all partied for a while, John considered this. That he was interested in Ringo more than before. At this point, he wasn’t sure he could deny it to himself any longer. He watched Ringo during shows. He sat next to Ringo and told more jokes when he was around to make him laugh. When he got overwhelmed with the sheer amount of sensory input, he imagined going to bed and sleeping in Ringo’s arms. It just wasn’t something he could pretend was nothing anymore. It wasn’t like he’d felt about any of his mates before, just... past girlfriends.

The realization that he was queer and quite possibly in love with Ringo was not an easy one to handle. This couldn’t get out to the other lads. His first thought was to stop sharing rooms with Ringo. Remove himself from the situation. But the more he thought about it, the more he was reluctant to actually do that. It’s not like anyone knew he was queer, and they wouldn’t catch on if John could just control himself a little better. No one had to know, and he could keep getting good sleep. And he had already agreed to share a room with Ringo tonight. It would be more suspicious now for him to back out suddenly after they had been sharing for what felt like a long time.

Sometimes he wondered if Ringo enjoyed cuddling with him too, at least subconsciously. He was always agreeable to sharing with John, and he always put his arm around him almost instantly. And he never made a fuss if he woke up with John asleep curled up against him. He just kind of pet his hair until he woke up. That was one of his favorite parts. Ringo was always so sweet in the morning, and he always looked so rumpled and soft. God, he really was queer, wasn’t he?

He walked out of the bathroom feeling incredibly nervous, but calmed down a little once he saw Ringo, asleep already as he often was when John came into the room, and breathing softly. Nothing had to change right away. It didn’t stop his heart from jumping with new awareness when Ringo’s arm went around him in a way that was now familiar. John bit his lip, and just like that first night, considered crossing another step. If he was going to have to lay off for a while, he may as well get what he could now. In the dark, he felt around for Ringo’s hand, laying on top of him, and interlaced their fingers. It was wonderful, and as he drifted off to sleep, he let himself imagine just for a little while a world where they could really be together, and Ringo would return his feelings.

The next day, John resolved himself to sharing a room with someone else. He needed to get used to the fact that he wouldn’t always be able to share a room with Ringo, and start trying to move past his feelings. So when Brian handed out their room keys, assuming the pairings and leaving with a wave, John spoke up.

“Why don’t we share tonight Paul? It’s been a while since we have.” 

“Yeah, and it’s the most restful sleep I’ve had for a while.” Paul joked. “You toss and turn all night long.” John frowned, not expecting any push back.

“No complaint from me either.” George added in. “I love ya Richie, but your snoring is atrocious. Good on you two for putting up with each other so long.” John’s brain caught on something.

“Snoring? Ringo doesn't snore.” He glanced over at Ringo, who looked somewhat uncomfortable. Paul laughed.

“Yes he does! Loudest snoring I’ve ever heard, second he falls asleep.” John looked confused around, and Ringo finally spoke up.

“C’mon John, let’s share for tonight.” He said, not waiting for a response and grabbing his wrist to pull him along in the direction of their room. “Goodnight you two!” He called behind them at Paul and George who seemed mildly confused by the whole conversation.

Once they got in their room, John sat down on the bed while Ringo hovered nearby.

“So, snoring? How come I haven’t noticed? I’m not usually the heaviest sleeper.” That is, at least when he wasn’t cuddled up to Ringo. He had a feeling he knew where this was going, and he felt some bile rise in his throat.

“I... You may have been falling asleep before me.” Ringo answered, not looking at him.

“So all the times that I-”

“Yeah. Sorry lad, I thought you wouldn’t try it if I just suggested it, and I thought it really might help you sleep.” John was thrown. Ringo knew the whole time? Had wanted John to do it? Was it possible that maybe Ringo was feeling the same things as him?

“Ringo, are you... queer?” Ringo frowned, and John understood. It sounded nasty saying it like that.

“I wasn’t trying to make a pass at you John, I just wanted to help you sleep.” It didn’t escape John that Ringo didn’t deny he was queer. Or that Ringo still wouldn’t meet his eyes. Without thinking it over much at all, John decided to take a chance. He got up and walked over quickly to Ringo, who finally looked up at him when he got in his personal space. He hesitated for just a second, inches from Ringo’s face, before bringing his hands up to hold his head and kiss him soundly on the lips. Not as harsh as he’d originally intended to, softened by his anxiety. It took only a second before Ringo was relaxing into the kiss and responding.

John continued kissing him for only a brief moment before he pulled back to stare at Ringo in awe. Ringo had a similar expression.

“Oh thank god.” Ringo said, and John laughed. “I was worried you were gonna sock me.” John frowned, and swiped his thumb over Ringo’s cheek. He didn’t have anything to say in response though, so he just leaned in for one more soft kiss.

“You do help me sleep.” He admitted softly, once he had pulled away once again. Ringo’s smile was so bright he felt like he needed sunglasses.

“You help me sleep too John.” It wasn’t an admission of feelings, but it was as close as they could get for now. John smiled back at Ringo, and pulled him towards the bed, ready to fall asleep in his arms again, and know Ringo wanted it too.

**Author's Note:**

> So I have something already in mind for a second part (probably only two parts but we'll see), that I'll do as soon as I actually have any time at all to write. I hope this doesn't seem rushed.


End file.
